Sage-like in the locker room

Monday, February 04, 2008 | | |

I would normally not post anything I overheard in the locker-room at the gym, for obvious reasons. The gym I usually go to is a corporate gym, so the guys there are a little more "buttoned-up" than I suspect they'd be otherwise. You never know who's listening. But today, that didn't stop a couple of guys that were in there with me . . .

Guy 1 (fairly skinny guy - an obvious runner, addressing Guy 2): "So how are the HGH and the "roids" working out for you?"

For those of you who haven't paid attention to "SteriodGate" in baseball, that's Human Growth Hormone. It's supposed to crank up your muscle mass and speed metabolism. But any way you look at it, it's cheating and there's a nice stigma attached.

Guy 2 (HUGE guy, clearly a weight lifter, and apparently a drug user): "It's good stuff, I need to crank up the dosage so I can get @#$%$'n HUGE."

Guy 1 (not at all shocked by any of this): "Can you still drink like you used to?"

Apparently Guy 1 & Guy 2 must have a long history of drunkenness together.

Guy 2 (proudly): "I'm drinking beer all the time, a whole bunch every night . . . can't understand why I have the big gut though."

Yeah Capericus, so hard to believe that massive beer consumption will give you a gut.

Guy 1: "I just do the hard stuff now. I end up spending most of the weekend passed out somewhere. ha ha ha Maybe that would help with the gut."

Now this is definitely the guy you want your daughter to bring home.

Guy 2 (in all seriousness): "I'm gonna try to switch over to rum and Pepsi to see if that does the trick. Might mix in a little more cardio too."

Clearly this is a fitness guru who knows how to control his weight.

Anyway, at this point the conversation ended, at least the part I had to hear, and they headed off to the showers. I appreciated the silence they left behind. This all made me NOT miss high school locker rooms. It's clear that locker rooms must do something to some guy's conversation filters. And typically when those filters are off, some guys are revealed to be actual . . . well . . . idiots.

On a positive note - I now have two more real-life examples to use when I talk to my kids about what drinking and drugs do to the brain.

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