Spending A Saturday Night With Teenage Vampires and Living to Blog About It

So this weekend the Mrs. HTF made a run to the local Target to pick up the long-awaited DVD version of some vampire movie that you may have heard of (no, she’s not one of “those people” – you know, the obsessed kind – the movie was just on sale.)  I think we had a discussion about whether or not we should buy the thing, but I must’ve been Jedi-Mind-Tricked because somehow we did actually buy it and I don’t remember a fight.  Yes, I’m now the proud owner of a Twlight DVD.  But before I’m forced to turn in my man-card, let’s be clear, I’m the owner of it in the same way that I’m the owner of my wife’s mascara (yeah, legally mine, but if I were to actually touch it with the intent to use it, you may as well shoot me).

And so, on Saturday night, we found ourselves (along with my sister and her brave husband) watching Bella and Eduardo do their thing.  Not knowing what to expect at all, except for vampires and unreal-teenage-romance, I admit to a little trepidation.  A few takeaways from the flick:

• Wow, the Washington State Tourism folks shouldn’t show this to anybody.  Had I seen this before I moved here a few months ago I’d have had second thoughts.  Apparently the state is entirely devoid of color and the people all have faces the color of the Obama’s new house.
• Movie was scarier than I expected.  I’m a massive wimp with anything approaching horror/scariness, so pretty sure that Traci was rightfully laughing at me.  When did so many females start liking stuff like this?!  Is it just the heavy dose of romance that let’s them sorta tolerate the vampires tearing apart security guards and unlucky boater guys?
• Baseball scene was pretty much my favorite – who knew vampires could ball?!
• The movie’s music would’ve made Dora the Explorer feel like a horror flick.
• Apparently vampires make big bucks, cuz that family had a super-cool house and sweet cars.
• Did anyone wonder if Bella realizes that her crazy-haired (yes, I’m just saying that because I’m insanely jealous) boyfriend is like 80 years old?
• Fight scenes worked for me, but the sneering and animal-noises the darling draculas (GNFARB) made were over the top.  Also liked the cool vampire family who don’t attack humans.  The bad guys could’ve looked “badder” but they acted plenty bad.
• I was told repeatedly as I interjected opinion during the movie that I needed to read the book to really understand.  I’m on the fence on that one . . .  (yes, I’m worried that if I read the thing I’ll like it and get made fun of)

Anyway, those were just a few observations.  Overall I thought it was alright, but didn’t really catch the frenzy that seems to be out there.  Still, I expected to not like it at all, so I was pleasantly surprised.  I’m still befuddled (technical term) by the huge appeal to most women I know, but then again, I’m a guy so “befuddled” and “women” almost always belong in the same sentence.

PS – If you really think I should read the book, let me know.