Republicans Get Loco, Moose Hunting Among Friends, and There Will Be Change

Thursday, September 04, 2008 | Labels: , | |

So I just finished watching McCain's speech and the end of the RNC. It should probably be renamed RDB (Republicans Dancing Badly). Clearly there is an epidemic of rhythmically-impaired Republicans and we need an emergency Federal Program to address the problem. Right now there are lots and lots of balloons and winter has started early in Minnesota, cuz it looks like it snowing in there. Pretty sure that one of those white beach-ball balloons knocked over the Senator's 138 year-old mother. (who I'm not a fan of because of this)

I hope that a lot of you (by which I mean both of you who read my blog) got to see some of the show this week. I think the way we elect a president is a bizarre process, which I'll document for you at some point, but these conventions are a marvelous way to kick off the last couple months of more political ads than actual TV programing. Reflecting on it now though, they should've probably just ended it last night with Sarah Palin's speech. Are you serious?! That was amazing. If you haven't seen it, go check it out, regardless of your party, gender, race, age, religion, shoe size, dental care status, or haircut - it was riveting. She won me over, really did. A week ago when she was announced I was dumbfounded and thought JohnnyMac had seen BO's speech the night before and just decided to throw the election. It took some time, but Gov Palin's speech made me a convert and she is now a full-fledged rock star. Brilliant move politically . . . as long at it, you know, works. PLUS they'll probably get ALL of Alaska's electoral votes, which are shared with Montana.

From the convention we've learned that the GOP is:

- For Change (shocker)
- Against the liberal, mean, stinky, out-of-touch, make-up-wearing, wimpy, elite media
- For Hockey-Moms (a term I'd never heard and still don't know what it means, but I'm assuming it's something about mothers who fight with sticks and gloves while ice skating)
- Against people who give great speeches in front of monstrous foam pillars in massive stadiums
- Not capable of pulling off any recognizable dance moves
- Totally supportive of Change
- In favor of moving "Washington" to an entirely different location, such as Wassila, Alaska
- Planning to fight corruption by sending offenders to France

So now it is on! This hopefully means that Wolf Blitzer and Anderson Cooper will continue their broadcast in matching suits for the next 60 days, straight. I'm thinking that it would be marvelous if the 4 candidates went together on a moose-hunting trip in Alaska. That would be some PRICELESS reality TV. You can rest assured that the moose would be a little more frightened of the Republican ticket. I've just learned that the caribou can't vote in the national election, however, they do play a big roll in local politics I'm told. In some Alaskan counties you're required to wear antlers in the city council meetings.

We'll all be watching and listening, and a few of us, the moose to be specific, may even be dancing.

2 comments:

  1. Anonymous says:

    Hello from Russia!
    Can I quote a post "No teme" in your blog with the link to you?

  2. HTF says:

    Not entirely sure what you're asking, but sure, link away!

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